THE HIDDEN FACE PROFESSIONAL

Be a Hollywood hero is the message, you may be riddled with bullet holes and have one arm hanging off – but whatever you do don’t show you are hurting and do not slow down for a second. You only have to watch a playground reaction to a boy bursting into tears to see this in evidence even today. Men were expected to ‘suck it up, get on with it or deal with it’ which is nonsense, unproductive for a business profitability perspective and from a health perspective, damaging. This is often the behaviour I witnessed in the business world. It’s not OK for boys to be vulnerable, to show sign of apparent weakness or not being able to cope. Many boys are raised to be tough, remember that ‘Big boys don’t cry’ mentality? It’s OK for boys to be assertive, strong, rough and tumble.

THE HIDDEN FACE PROFESSIONAL

If a mental health professional was assessing someone against this criteria, he would depend mainly on self-disclosure which raises two key problems for men with depression – the first is they are less likely to seek the help of a mental health professional and secondly their upbringing and the shame associated with talking about or expressing feelings means that they may not talk about it even if they go. Recurrent thoughts of death (not just fear of dying) with or without a specific plan.Diminished ability to think or concentrate or indecisiveness, nearly every day.Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt (which may be delusional) nearly every day.Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day.Markedly diminished interest and pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day.Depressed mood – most of the day, nearly every day.The DSM-IV diagnostic criteria for a major depressive disorder Only 25% of people who seek help for depression in the UK are men and yet recent studies conclude that the actual number of depressed men is over 30%. One in four of us will have a mental health issue in our lives. It got me curious and began to look behind it to see what could be driving it. This behaviour seemed acceptable, and in some places expected and I could not understand it. My interest came from working in the business world for over 20 years and observing behaviour that I did not really connect with which seemed unhelpful, counterproductive and unnecessarily aggressive.

Often men are unaware they are depressed and may even exhibit destructive behaviours. Male depression is hidden because depression presents in men differently to women in most cases. You will have come across the hidden face of male depression at home, in your relationship, in your family and at work but you may not know it.

The hidden face